Standing By: How to Support a Loved One in Crisis

When someone close to us is going through a severe emotional crisis, the instinct is to fix things immediately. But genuine support works differently — it takes time, patience, and the combined effort of several people.

A circle, not a single person

Dr. Saulitis emphasises that placing all responsibility on one person is too great a burden. A small group of trusted people who work together and stay present over time gives someone in crisis something no single conversation can provide: stability and the knowledge that they are not alone.

This does not mean being available around the clock. It means each person in the circle takes on a manageable role — one maintains regular contact, another helps with daily tasks, another accompanies the person to appointments.

Routine and structure as a form of care

One of the most meaningful things a loved one can do is help create a predictable day. Stable sleep, regular meals, and consistent activity — particularly physical work — help a person maintain their inner equilibrium (homeostasis). When someone in crisis sees that a caring, non-pressuring presence is helping them build that structure, the structure itself becomes therapeutic.

Listening without rushing

If the person opens up and talks about how hard things are, that is already a positive sign. A trusting conversation in which the loved one simply listens — without judgement or instructions to "pull yourself together" — reduces internal tension. You do not need to find the perfect words. What matters is genuine presence and a real willingness to hear.

That said, the support of loved ones does not replace professional help. If you see that someone is in serious distress, the next step is always the same: seek a specialist.

Where to get help

If the situation is acute, do not wait. Contact a psychiatrist or psychologist as soon as possible. If there is an immediate risk to life, call the emergency services or a crisis line available in your country without delay.

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It is the most important decision you can make.