Workaholism: How Loved Ones Can Help Without Causing More Harm

When someone close to you is working themselves to the bone, family members often feel stuck: confronting them feels cruel, yet staying silent is unbearable. Dr. Saulitis points to several key principles that allow you to offer real support without making things worse.

Guilt Is Not a Lever

A person burned out by overwork already carries a heavy sense of responsibility toward their family. Piling on guilt — "you've abandoned us," "you've become a stranger" — doesn't motivate change. It adds another layer of stress on top of exhaustion. The family is all of you together. Emotional pressure alone changes nothing for either side.

Speak to Needs, Not Grievances

Rather than unloading accumulated resentments, try shifting the focus: your loved one is needed by the family as a healthy person — as a partner, a parent, a friend. Say that out loud. Dr. Saulitis suggests a simple perceptual shift: see this person not only as your spouse, but as the father or mother of your child. It cuts through personal grievances and brings what truly matters into view.

Support the Restoration of Basic Homeostasis

The most concrete thing loved ones can do is create the conditions for recovery: weekends free of gadgets, physical activity outdoors, proper sleep, food without excess sugar, no alcohol. Not lectures — an environment. Little by little, things will start to settle.

When Professional Help Is Needed

If someone is already operating in a state of chronic exhaustion, this is no longer just tiredness. Dr. Saulitis describes it as classic burnout with organic depression and asthenia. Gently, without ultimatums, suggest seeking professional support — not because something is "broken," but because the family needs a present, alive human being.